Listening to God

I used to walk in a boldness that is escaping me right now.  I am wondering when the switch happened.  I believe in listening to those little nudges.  Years ago I read a book by Charlie Shedd called "The brush of Angel Wings" In the book Charlie talks about making a deal with God that he would give himself permission to blow off the first two nudges but if he was nudged three times about something he would do it... no matter what. 

That made sense to me.  I am not always sure I am feeling a nudge. Sometimes I wonder if I am just making stuff up.  But by the time I get that third nudge I'm pretty confident of it's origin.  The book is a bunch of stories about what happened when Charlie got a nudge and followed it.  Like the time he was nudged to go and visit a member of his church.  He was planning a romantic meal with his wife at the time and didn't want to go but on the third nudge he adjusted his plans and found himself being at the right place at the right time.  Just as he arrived a young wife was receiving the news that her husband was killed on the job.God does amazing things when we listen! I can remember the day I was nudged to call an old friend many miles away.  He picked up the phone and said, "I bet you have no idea why you called do you?" Well, I did have an idea, I felt nudged and told him so, my suicidal friend got off the phone feeling as if he mattered to God.  It was awesome!

So why do I hesitate?  Sometimes God is audacious and sometimes I don't want to be?  Did I just say that out loud? The living bible translates the first part of Joshua 1:6 like this "Be strong and courageous for you are the one..." God, I don't feel very strong or courageous right now. But I want to be... or at least I want to want to be strong and courageous. (listening)  I believe it is time for courage. (listening) Hmmm the picture I have is of Jesus in the garden and of the angel that comes to strengthen Him and of Stephen who was stoned to death because of his passion for Jesus.  While he was being stoned to death he sees heaven open and he is so geeked about what he sees that it's like he doesn't even notice the stones.  The picture I have is that courage is supernatural not something I have to make myself be more like something I can receive if I want to.

cool! God give me courage!