Friday, June 3, 2011

Following the Ball

I have a ministry called, "Follow the Ball". I hesitate to call it a "ministry" because it is just a principal that I want to live out and God can do with what He will. It's named after the old sing-a-longs TV shows that had song words going across the screen and a bouncing ball on top of the words to help you know what to sing next.

The idea is to follow God's lead, not to go ahead and not to get behind, just follow the lead. It's not easy. I get swallowed up a lot in the clamor in life. I'm not sure how well my spiritual hearing is doing. Sometimes I wonder if I'm going spiritually deaf. Usually, when I ask God about that He shows me that I have my fingers stuck in my ears (again).

So I'm wondering today why my fingers are in my ears. (Listening as best you can with your fingers in your ears) It makes it hard to hear when your fingers are in your ears and the only way I know to have the courage to take them out is to hear the LORD. God what about that? (listening... or trying to) It feels like I can't tell the difference between fear and exhaustion. That sounds funny to say. Maybe I am afraid of exhaustion, like I'm afraid God is going to ask me to do one more thing and I just don't have it. What about that God? (listening)

Hmmm, the picture I have is that there are two kind of exhaustion. One is when you have put in a hard day's work. There is a sense of accomplishment and peace with that. Then there is the kind of exhaustion where you are battling up stream... swimming but not getting anywhere. The sense I have is that God doesn't ask me to do the latter. He asks for a day's work, because we were created for good work.

But, I have MCS. That often translates into chronic fatigue. A day's work for me is more than exhausting at times. I'm tired of that exhaustion! What about that God? (listening) Hmmm the sense I have is that fear is exhausting and rest, deep inner rest comes from Him. Hmmm so are rest and work opposites? (listening) Hmmm, I would have said they are but I have a picture in my head of resting peacefully while digging in my garden.

So what does all that have to do following the ball? (listening) I hearing Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Wow, that has a whole new meaning to me right now!

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