This thread starts on February 7th
It’s morning at least according to the clock. I didn’t sleep much last night… grrr! Yesterday was busy but I did something that made a big difference. This might seem like a small thing to an organized person but I feel pretty empowered by it. I had a delivery to make yesterday to a ministry across town. I called ahead and was given several options for times. I would usually turn myself into a pretzel to get there at their convenience. But yesterday I took the rest of my day into consideration and scheduled my delivery when it best worked for both her and I. That gave me the time to not be rushed and disorganized at the beginning of my day. I think my whole day went better because of it.
Boundaries are hard sometimes. I guess I’m learning that they are not something you take on and off like clothing at the end of your day. Boundaries are maybe a layer beyond your skin that defines where you leave off and another begins. Funny, like skin it stings me just as much when boundaries are scraped, battered, or pushed against. Even when it’s me that scrapes against my own. Somehow for me having boundaries and keeping my day ordered was “ordering something”.
God does organizing my day count? (listening) Hmmm what I keep hearing is that my list is not a bunch of rules to follow but guidelines, like God is saying, “This is how to get there from here” in response to my request for help and direction. Hmmm. I have been at this for 11 days now and I have yet to do all ten things on my list in any given day. My days have been too full. But I don’t hear God saying. “I gave you 10 simple things to do in a day and you can’t even do that! What is the matter with you??? I don’t even get a sense that He is disappointed.
I remember what it was like to have my first baby. Oh my gosh! I was barely able to keep up with my life before I had kids. To add diaper changing, feedings, car seats, piles of laundry and baths into the picture was overwhelming to say the least. But, bit by bit, day by day, it became routine. This feels the same. I hear from God that it takes time and that He has all the time in the world. No pressure, just hope :)
Yesterday’s report:
1) (bsmtg w God) It was hard for me to focus yesterday, lots on my plate
2) (blog) yup
3) (ARK) I talked, well mostly listened to someone who has a lump and is waiting for evaluation of a scan. Fear is so cruel.
4) (Cln smthg) I did a lot of cleaning up after some construction happening at our house. It had to happen yesterday so more progress could happen.
5) (Odr smthg) Though those forms are still unfinished and glaring at me from the dining room table I did order my day well yesterday and plan of taming these horrible monsters (forms ugh!) today!
6) (Bk) hmmm this one seems to be my big hurdle
7) (Fam) yup
8) (Me) God what does this mean exactly? (listening) hmmm what I hear is walk with Me today. I guess this will take some pondering. In the mean time it is actually warm enough for a walk today. :)
9) (Mnstry) busy day with people yesterday
10) (rest) none what-so-ever grrr!
Nope, no disappointment at all coming from God. Just like a loving parent, who already knows we are going to stumble and make mistakes, he is there to help us up and love us even all the more because he is proud we are walking, even if it is nearly impossible for us to do so at times, he is always right their.
ReplyDeleteGreat job working your program, it is just a guideline. Praise God for that.