To Understand this blog you might need to read Bringing life to order (February 7, 2011)
I went whining into my business meeting with God this morning. Order seems impossible for me. You know the saying, “the hurrieder I go the behinder I get?” Well, mine is; “the more I try to bring order the more chaos I produce.” I’m discouraged today. I start feeling sorry for the people around me cause my disorder causes them pain. It is true, I have a family full of prophetic/truth based people (meaning they are bent towards bringing things to order) When they come to my house and it is in order they thank me…like I have just given them a gift… Order is a gift I can give to my family. Oh well, There are more things in chaos today in my world than there were yesterday. God help me! What’s the deal with that? (listening but not hearing much)
Bringing to order… does going to the dentist or solving flat tire issues count? But then there is the forgetting to pay the storage unit bill and leaving tools at my son’s house that need to be at mine by 10 this morning while I need to be somewhere else by 10 this morning Grrrrr! Just those two acts of forgetting will cut my morning short by an hour. So, God, if you said do these 10 things every day and my days will be productive… how can I be productive if I can never get them done?? (listening)
Hmmm, so it feels like I’m to look back and see if I have been “productive.” If “productive” means cleaning the house and taking out the garbage then, no. But if productive is taking ground for the kingdom. It feels like I have done nothing but one on one “ministry” for the last three days. Does doing “ministry” with family count? OMG(osh) I can’t believe how much I second guess the “rules”. I don’t believe God gave me rules just guidelines. What do I do with that God? (listening) It feels like doing this exercise if first of all exposing how much I am still trying to follow the law, that is what I think God wants me to do rather than living in relationship/partnership with Him. This isn’t about doing these 10 things but listening to God and partnering with Him in bringing my live to order.
Ok God, I’m listening
1) (bm w God) God and I had a productive business meeting.
2) (blog) I got my blog done. Makes you wonder if your talking to the wind
3) (ARK) Yesterday the friend I was going to call, called me! Fail
4) (Cln smthg) I didn’t even do the dishes yesterday
5) (Odr smthg) Does going to the dentist and dealing with flat tire issues count?
6) (Bk) Today I cashed in on a coupon for 100 dollars of free adwords advertising and started a free ad campaign (like for 20 days) on the internet
7) (Fam) Had more meaningful and productive encounters with Family today. Prayed a lot for Hubby cause yesterday was a pivotal day @ work for him. He sold the project w00t!
8) (Me) Hmmm, still asking, “what does me time look like?”
9) (Mnstry) I spent sometime with Rebecca my ministry partner on the phone. She is doing a seminar on the Bride of Christ in March. We talked about strategy for a while does that count? (I’m getting sick of that question but it’s in my head so I’m asking)
10) (rest) not much restful time today grrr!